Recently, Jen posted a video on my FB page that had me laughing so hard, I'll include that clip below but it got me thinking about all the stuff that we used to do to our parents and our grandparents just to annoy them. See Jen's clip below:
It was later revealed that her granddaughter had actually took her Jesus statue and held it for ransom as a joke. But before she could let the cat out of the bag, the Grandma called the news. Anyway, case in point, one day, Jen and I were bored and we decided to change our parents answering machine greeting to something funny. So we got online and started googling for ideas. We decided, since my Mom is rather religious that a Satan greeting would be the most hilarious and get her the most riled up. So we began recording. Jen used this really creepy, slithery voice and when the answering machine turned on, it went something like this, "Oh, hello Lucifer speaking. What in hell do you want?" {chuckles} "Please leave me a message." Then in the background I start screaming bloody murder, and then shriek, "We'll call you baaaack." It was ridiculous, and we did it while my parents were gone so they would have no idea until someone called, and then left a very confused message on their machine. Unfortunately, our grandmother foiled our plans by calling, several times that day while we were recording the message and then when we finished. She got to hear the whole thing, and promptly called my Dad in a very confused tone, "Um....I just called your house....I think, Kali and Jenna were messing with your machine." I don't think anyone thought this was hilarious except Jenna and myself. My Dad called and I answered, "What'd you do to the answering machine?"
"Nothing," I tried to answer innocently.
"Hang up and don't answer, I want to hear this new message."
My Mom called me back, "That's disgusting."
We changed it promptly that evening when my parents got home and listened to it. However, it was funny and it also got me thinking about how little people actually pay attention to voice mail greetings before leaving messages. Case in point, I remember through out high school, there was an old woman that frequently left messages on my parents answering machine (dang it, she didn't hear the Lucifer greeting, however, I'm sure it would not have phased her) regardless of being told frequently when we were home, that she had the wrong number. I remember hearing messages like, "Gladys, I can't find my glasses. Did I leave them at your place?" and message number two, "Found my glasses Gladys. See you tomorrow." Really? This went on for quite a while until it suddenly stopped, and I remember wondering sadly if she had died because even though her messages and calls were annoying, she was obviously living alone and only had a few friends that she spent time with. Hopefully, Gladys just finally wrote down her number correctly. :)
My phone number is a local number from the my hometown (I haven't gotten it changed, but I will) and unfortunately it is only one digit different than someone else's number back home, and I frequently get phone calls from back home asking for electric companies, or Bill, George, or some other name. I even get left voice mails, again, if you listened to the voice mail greeting which clearly states, "Hey guys this is KALI, leave me a message." You would know to hang up, not leave me voice mails at 3 a.m. saying, "JORDAN!!!!! [yes, he was yelling that] You need to call me back. A.S.A.P." Really? You just left that message for Jordan with me? I also get random texts from high school girls asking, "Who is this?" "Answer me." "Who is this?" With little signatures underneath like this reading **CaItLyN**. No, Caitlyn I am not trying to steal your boyfriend, I am 25, married and no longer even live in Montana.
Anyway, my point is, I need to change my number, and two, regardless of the annoyance, the fact that people pay very little attention to greetings astounds me. Unfortunately, I find myself doing this all the time in daily life though too, for example if a stranger asks me, "How are you doing?" I immediately respond, "Good and you." and before I leave, if they say,"You enjoy those fresh tomatoes now." I automatically respond,"Yah you too. Thanks." Or occasionally I say, "You're welcome" just out of habit. Um....what? Normally I just walk away after that, because if I stayed to correct myself, it would just make it more awkward right? It's just an automatic reaction, because I'm assuming they're going to say, "Have a nice day/night/morning." or "Thanks come again." So I respond accordingly, because you know what else? People are really rude. I always make a point to tell employees to have a good day, or to even ask how their day is going because often times they look at me in shock and say, "It's going ok, thanks for asking." I've been on the other end of that, working in a bakery, almost all of my horror stories in customer service come from working in a bakery, which is also astounding because who can be mad when you're surrounded by cake and doughnuts? I've also worked as a waitress and bartender, and one woman actually said to me one day while I was clearing her table, "I know I'm a real bitch, but you're just gonna have to deal with it today." And I smiled and said, "Don't worry, I've actually had to deal with worse." No one ever apologizes to you, or asks you how you're doing, and rarely says please and thank you. Everyone's just gotta be somewhere else, doing something more important. But then again, sometimes I don't know if we would notice if everyone started to act polite and human. After all, I'm still trying to track down Jordan so I can relay the message.
Here's another funny message I tracked down on youtube. Currently living in Texas, this really makes me a laugh, especially references to the car "windah."
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